Revisiting my predictions for 2024
Revisiting my predictions for 2024
Greetings fellas, I have returned from a trip to the old boards and found the transcript of my "24 predictions for 2024." Will there be 25 for 2025? Stay tuned. But I thought it would be entertaining to revisit these takes in article form and give myself some line notes.
I actually got some things right, it turns out. Read the original article here: https://simleaguenirvana.proboards.com/ ... tions-2024
1. The Rockets continue on their historic roll and win the 2010 SLN title
They did not win it - the Grizzlies did. The Rockets did, however, win the 2012-2013 title. Some good Rockets teams back then. I was at least on to something here.
2. Jeremy Lin becomes the No. 1 pick in the 2010 Draft
He was not the No. 1 pick in the 2010 draft — Paul George was. He has, however, had a pretty interesting saga of a career. Will some smart GM sign him on an MLE just to play him for like 10 games a year next season???
3. Hoff exhausts his sack for Kobe Bryant, Yao, Allen Iverson and...Sasha Pavlovic
Hoff didn't do this (I don't think?), but he did blow his sack and win a championship eventually. I feel like he also eventually had Kobe. When I wrote this original prediction, Calvin was still the GM of the Pacers. My memory is fuzzy.
4. Zero Time SLN Champion Matt wins his first SLN title (sooner than later)
The Bulls won the 2011-12 title, I am a genius.
5. LeBron wins his first title in Philadelphia by the end of this contract...
He did not.
6. But... DMo trades LeBron by the start of 2025
He did. To me. Self-fulfilling prophecy? Or a long-play psyop run by yours truly???
7. My very handsome Tree Son Merv wins his first GMOTY award
He did win GMOTY (I think?). He did not get more handsome.
8. My equally handsome Tree Son Steven wins his first draft lottery
Steven did win the lottery and drafted Anthony Davis. In the original article I called Steven "Tyrus Thomas Pynchon," which I thought should be brought back.
9. Steph Curry and Kevin Durant win SLN scoring titles
KD has done this multiple times. Steph didn't (think he was a rookie when I wrote this). Did you guys know KD has never been All-SLN first team or won MVP? That's goofy.
10. Andrei Kirilenko retires early, and as a Timberwolf
The city is Moscow, the year is 2012, and Andrei Kirilenko lurks alone in a dark karaoke bar, his giant Yakuza back tattoo glistening in the dim light. A cloaked man takes the stage and flings off his hood. It's Ben Pankin. He takes the microphone. The opening riff of Third Eye Blind's arguably greatest song ever written where the lyrics really don't make sense Never Let You Go blares out over the stage. Andrei cracks a smile.
"Ben," he thinks, "will never let me turn around your back on each other. Nyet."
Neither of these things happened. But I really enjoyed writing that paragraph.
11. GMs convene for our first inaugural SLN convention
Sadly, this didn't happen. Maybe next year.
12. Ralph and Matt kiss and make up
Still time for you guys to make out on NYE!!!
13. Ashes starts hiding some legitimate hidden gems in the NDL
Nope, didn't happen, but I did get a nice 10-day stretch out of Torrey Craig.
14. The 2014 free agent class causes an insane cap-space-hoarding frenzy
This was bold because I don't think our league has ever actually hoarded cap space since FA is such a weird game mechanic. Oh well.
15. Russell Westbrook outpaces Derrick Rose developmentally
You could argue that he did? But that his stip made it not matter — Russ has to start at PG, whereas Rose has had a way better career after moving to the two. Call this one a push I guess? Rose > Russ IRL and in fake life.
16. Zion Williamson profiles as one of the best prospects in SLN history, but with some type of weird stip attached
Feels like Zion should enter SLN with the best inside scoring rating/strength/jumping combo for a rookie in history. Also feels like there needs to be some type of conditioning stip that drastically impacts his quickness and strength from season to season on a permanently changing basis. Something to think about.
My original take was kind of on point, but he did not have a stip, and he evidently was not one of the best prospects in SLN history. Still time for potentia to take over.
17. The Clippers have a more successful decade than the Lakers
This was written Pre-XTractor, who wrested control over the West after getting his feet wet. Sorry Bobby.
18. Someone becomes a three-time champion
The Jazz did it! And could win No. 4 in the next 24 hours.
19. From Orlando: "Embiid > Jokic."
I still love this debate because Jokic is a fucking offensive machine and won a ring, whereas Embiid has not won one but is also really amazing. Ashes nailed the construction of both guys. I think I'd rather have Jokic but it's very close. Idk if Merv was right or not.
20. From Boston: "From coldest to hottest: the Pistons win a playoff series; the team 3PA per game record will be broken multiple times; Markelle Fultz will have this year's best stip"
Joe nailed the first one, not sure about the second one, third one didn't land.
21. From the Sim God: “Inside focus will gain a serious uptick in momentum. Building rosters around strong inside and free throw shooting is the untapped strategy for FBB”
Good call from Ashes — Tyler won a title by wrecking me with Boban, and there have been some interesting inside teams finding success.
22. From Nav: We go a full calendar year with the same roster of GMs! True nirvana
Jayant quit.
23. From Jordo: "Spurs lose out and Jordan quits the league."
Jordo didn't quit.
24. From the Swamp: "Predict these nuts."
Fuck you Steven.
I actually got some things right, it turns out. Read the original article here: https://simleaguenirvana.proboards.com/ ... tions-2024
1. The Rockets continue on their historic roll and win the 2010 SLN title
They did not win it - the Grizzlies did. The Rockets did, however, win the 2012-2013 title. Some good Rockets teams back then. I was at least on to something here.
2. Jeremy Lin becomes the No. 1 pick in the 2010 Draft
He was not the No. 1 pick in the 2010 draft — Paul George was. He has, however, had a pretty interesting saga of a career. Will some smart GM sign him on an MLE just to play him for like 10 games a year next season???
3. Hoff exhausts his sack for Kobe Bryant, Yao, Allen Iverson and...Sasha Pavlovic
Hoff didn't do this (I don't think?), but he did blow his sack and win a championship eventually. I feel like he also eventually had Kobe. When I wrote this original prediction, Calvin was still the GM of the Pacers. My memory is fuzzy.
4. Zero Time SLN Champion Matt wins his first SLN title (sooner than later)
The Bulls won the 2011-12 title, I am a genius.
5. LeBron wins his first title in Philadelphia by the end of this contract...
He did not.
6. But... DMo trades LeBron by the start of 2025
He did. To me. Self-fulfilling prophecy? Or a long-play psyop run by yours truly???
7. My very handsome Tree Son Merv wins his first GMOTY award
He did win GMOTY (I think?). He did not get more handsome.
8. My equally handsome Tree Son Steven wins his first draft lottery
Steven did win the lottery and drafted Anthony Davis. In the original article I called Steven "Tyrus Thomas Pynchon," which I thought should be brought back.
9. Steph Curry and Kevin Durant win SLN scoring titles
KD has done this multiple times. Steph didn't (think he was a rookie when I wrote this). Did you guys know KD has never been All-SLN first team or won MVP? That's goofy.
10. Andrei Kirilenko retires early, and as a Timberwolf
The city is Moscow, the year is 2012, and Andrei Kirilenko lurks alone in a dark karaoke bar, his giant Yakuza back tattoo glistening in the dim light. A cloaked man takes the stage and flings off his hood. It's Ben Pankin. He takes the microphone. The opening riff of Third Eye Blind's arguably greatest song ever written where the lyrics really don't make sense Never Let You Go blares out over the stage. Andrei cracks a smile.
"Ben," he thinks, "will never let me turn around your back on each other. Nyet."
Neither of these things happened. But I really enjoyed writing that paragraph.
11. GMs convene for our first inaugural SLN convention
Sadly, this didn't happen. Maybe next year.
12. Ralph and Matt kiss and make up
Still time for you guys to make out on NYE!!!
13. Ashes starts hiding some legitimate hidden gems in the NDL
Nope, didn't happen, but I did get a nice 10-day stretch out of Torrey Craig.
14. The 2014 free agent class causes an insane cap-space-hoarding frenzy
This was bold because I don't think our league has ever actually hoarded cap space since FA is such a weird game mechanic. Oh well.
15. Russell Westbrook outpaces Derrick Rose developmentally
You could argue that he did? But that his stip made it not matter — Russ has to start at PG, whereas Rose has had a way better career after moving to the two. Call this one a push I guess? Rose > Russ IRL and in fake life.
16. Zion Williamson profiles as one of the best prospects in SLN history, but with some type of weird stip attached
Feels like Zion should enter SLN with the best inside scoring rating/strength/jumping combo for a rookie in history. Also feels like there needs to be some type of conditioning stip that drastically impacts his quickness and strength from season to season on a permanently changing basis. Something to think about.
My original take was kind of on point, but he did not have a stip, and he evidently was not one of the best prospects in SLN history. Still time for potentia to take over.
17. The Clippers have a more successful decade than the Lakers
This was written Pre-XTractor, who wrested control over the West after getting his feet wet. Sorry Bobby.
18. Someone becomes a three-time champion
The Jazz did it! And could win No. 4 in the next 24 hours.
19. From Orlando: "Embiid > Jokic."
I still love this debate because Jokic is a fucking offensive machine and won a ring, whereas Embiid has not won one but is also really amazing. Ashes nailed the construction of both guys. I think I'd rather have Jokic but it's very close. Idk if Merv was right or not.
20. From Boston: "From coldest to hottest: the Pistons win a playoff series; the team 3PA per game record will be broken multiple times; Markelle Fultz will have this year's best stip"
Joe nailed the first one, not sure about the second one, third one didn't land.
21. From the Sim God: “Inside focus will gain a serious uptick in momentum. Building rosters around strong inside and free throw shooting is the untapped strategy for FBB”
Good call from Ashes — Tyler won a title by wrecking me with Boban, and there have been some interesting inside teams finding success.
22. From Nav: We go a full calendar year with the same roster of GMs! True nirvana
Jayant quit.
23. From Jordo: "Spurs lose out and Jordan quits the league."
Jordo didn't quit.
24. From the Swamp: "Predict these nuts."
Fuck you Steven.
free healthcare has never been more important
Journalists are bad predictors. Try again with 25 in 25’!
Ashes didn’t fire himself
23 has almost happened at least 5 times
I am straight up not having a good time
I predicted these nuts so that one was right on the money
Fauci is a nerd
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*lighter flick* Never talk to the cops I don’t speak piglatin / I turned the Nets into the motherfuckin Swamp Dragons
*lighter flick* Never talk to the cops I don’t speak piglatin / I turned the Nets into the motherfuckin Swamp Dragons
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