Historian Dispatch - 2004 and 2005 Retirings
Posted: February 20th, 2024, 2:19 pm
Dispatch from Springfield (or is our SLN located somewhere else? Houston, in honor of our commish?)
If things have been quiet on the Hall of Fame front, it’s not because your historians have taken their eye off the ball…it’s more so that we haven’t exactly seen the strongest set of retirings in the past few offseason from an SLN career perspective, and we think that 8 seasons in, it’s a little too late to be inducting guys based on real-life accomplishments. None of the guys below rank all that highly in the statistical criteria that Nick and I developed, nor do they pass our HoF “sniff test” (criteria include “he was him”, “got that dog in em”, and “that boy nice”), but let us know if you think there’s a strong case to be made based on SLN careers.
It's been 3 offseasons now since we held a true election, and if anything the quality of retirings has only gotten worse. Hopefully the quality of these classes will meaningfully pick up as the creation draft studs really get to the tail end of their career, and we can bring back voting for some of the league’s true studs. In the meantime, I’ll share some historian thoughts on my view of the best retiring guys over the past 5 years.
2004
2004 Jazz SF Scottie Pippen retires: Okay so Scottie actually warranted a second look given his real life pedigree, but he only had one season of true stardom when he averaged 29 ppg for the Sixers. His trade to the Jazz was the critical big swing Ralph took to build the early Jazz dynasty, but Scottie topped out as a strong supporting guy vs. a true alpha. His ~2.5 stocks in his prime were balanced by a ton of turnovers…kind of surprised his defense wasn’t better but he came into the league already in his 30s. Not everyone can be like Mike.
2004 Celtics SF Clyde Drexler retires: Clyde balled out his first year for that incredible Suns team as an All Star who put up 23-7-6 on efficient shooting, but never came close to those heights again; he had a few nice years on the Bullets, and tapered off with a proverbial whimper. Who was more washed on the Celtics: Clyde in SLN, or Shaq in real life?
2004 Suns PG Tim Hardaway retires: Stop me if I’m a broken record…Hardaway had a few fun years on the TMC Magic teams (RIP Mitchell) despite the >3 turnovers, and then fell off the cliff harder than Wil E Coyote. His contract ultimately became a total albatross; the Kemp trade was a misstep, but Richmond / Hardaway becoming total pumpkins overnight was what really sank those teams.
2004 Pacers SF Rick Fox retires: Known more for being handsome than his stocks, Rick dog always found himself on some contenders as quintessential wing depth. He had some nice years and offered good lineup versatility, but was never more than a solid role player. Not too much else to see here.
2004 Pistons SF Byron Russell retires: Russell went fairly high in the creation draft to the Bullets with hopes of being a quality two-way swingman, but it never quite panned out. The shooting never materialized, and his A defense in his prime never translated to more than 2 stocks…seems like there were a few of those guys in that era of SLN. Another “what if” for the Bullets supporting cast around Duncan/Allen.
2005
2005 170 Cavaliers C Vlade Divac retires: I saw Vlade get traded for 2 FRPs in the first season, decided that was reasonable value for a big man, and promptly thought it would be a good idea to light 2 FRPS on fire also for Rony Seikaly shortly thereafter. Holy shit was I a terrible GM those first couple of seasons. Anyways, Vlade was okay but the classic high volume / low stocks / meh efficiency big that are perennially out of favor.
2005 170 Spurs SF Toni Kukoc retires: I was skeptical the Heat re-signing Toni was a good move, but he proved to be a key wing piece on the Heat championship run. His contract was a tough towards the end of his career, but banners on the Internet hang forever!
2005 170 Hornets SF Doug Christie retires: I feel like I could write variations of the same blurb for Christie, Fox, and Russell, so I don’t have too much more to add. I completely agree with Quady that losing Christie in the Hakeem deal made it really hard for the Blazers to build a viable wing rotation around KG/Hakeem. Maybe we should have inducted Fox and Christie so they could have brawled again at the SLN induction!
2005 170 Warriors PF Tom Gugliotta retires: The all-time SLN bag thief…the modern era Chandler Parsons…would put Chase Daniel to shame. Another guy who had some early success with the Suns teams, but by the end become one of the worst players in the league – or an elite tank commander, depending on how you look at. Googs averaged a cool 10 points on 42.7% shooting on 2 turnovers a game at PF and landed me Iso Joe in the process. Guess it wasn’t all bad.
2005 170 Hawks SF Larry Johnson retires: LJ made a few All Star Games and was part of a few frisky Nets teams in the Prad era, but his volume was very high considering his efficiency, and the defense was never much to write home about. His stats also fluctuated pretty wildly year-to-year, so always a bit of a dice roll what you were gonna get with him (no UNLV pun intended).
Until next offseason…we’re waiting for you Dikembe (but not YOU yet TB, I know you have another season left in you).
If things have been quiet on the Hall of Fame front, it’s not because your historians have taken their eye off the ball…it’s more so that we haven’t exactly seen the strongest set of retirings in the past few offseason from an SLN career perspective, and we think that 8 seasons in, it’s a little too late to be inducting guys based on real-life accomplishments. None of the guys below rank all that highly in the statistical criteria that Nick and I developed, nor do they pass our HoF “sniff test” (criteria include “he was him”, “got that dog in em”, and “that boy nice”), but let us know if you think there’s a strong case to be made based on SLN careers.
It's been 3 offseasons now since we held a true election, and if anything the quality of retirings has only gotten worse. Hopefully the quality of these classes will meaningfully pick up as the creation draft studs really get to the tail end of their career, and we can bring back voting for some of the league’s true studs. In the meantime, I’ll share some historian thoughts on my view of the best retiring guys over the past 5 years.
2004
2004 Jazz SF Scottie Pippen retires: Okay so Scottie actually warranted a second look given his real life pedigree, but he only had one season of true stardom when he averaged 29 ppg for the Sixers. His trade to the Jazz was the critical big swing Ralph took to build the early Jazz dynasty, but Scottie topped out as a strong supporting guy vs. a true alpha. His ~2.5 stocks in his prime were balanced by a ton of turnovers…kind of surprised his defense wasn’t better but he came into the league already in his 30s. Not everyone can be like Mike.
2004 Celtics SF Clyde Drexler retires: Clyde balled out his first year for that incredible Suns team as an All Star who put up 23-7-6 on efficient shooting, but never came close to those heights again; he had a few nice years on the Bullets, and tapered off with a proverbial whimper. Who was more washed on the Celtics: Clyde in SLN, or Shaq in real life?
2004 Suns PG Tim Hardaway retires: Stop me if I’m a broken record…Hardaway had a few fun years on the TMC Magic teams (RIP Mitchell) despite the >3 turnovers, and then fell off the cliff harder than Wil E Coyote. His contract ultimately became a total albatross; the Kemp trade was a misstep, but Richmond / Hardaway becoming total pumpkins overnight was what really sank those teams.
2004 Pacers SF Rick Fox retires: Known more for being handsome than his stocks, Rick dog always found himself on some contenders as quintessential wing depth. He had some nice years and offered good lineup versatility, but was never more than a solid role player. Not too much else to see here.
2004 Pistons SF Byron Russell retires: Russell went fairly high in the creation draft to the Bullets with hopes of being a quality two-way swingman, but it never quite panned out. The shooting never materialized, and his A defense in his prime never translated to more than 2 stocks…seems like there were a few of those guys in that era of SLN. Another “what if” for the Bullets supporting cast around Duncan/Allen.
2005
2005 170 Cavaliers C Vlade Divac retires: I saw Vlade get traded for 2 FRPs in the first season, decided that was reasonable value for a big man, and promptly thought it would be a good idea to light 2 FRPS on fire also for Rony Seikaly shortly thereafter. Holy shit was I a terrible GM those first couple of seasons. Anyways, Vlade was okay but the classic high volume / low stocks / meh efficiency big that are perennially out of favor.
2005 170 Spurs SF Toni Kukoc retires: I was skeptical the Heat re-signing Toni was a good move, but he proved to be a key wing piece on the Heat championship run. His contract was a tough towards the end of his career, but banners on the Internet hang forever!
2005 170 Hornets SF Doug Christie retires: I feel like I could write variations of the same blurb for Christie, Fox, and Russell, so I don’t have too much more to add. I completely agree with Quady that losing Christie in the Hakeem deal made it really hard for the Blazers to build a viable wing rotation around KG/Hakeem. Maybe we should have inducted Fox and Christie so they could have brawled again at the SLN induction!
2005 170 Warriors PF Tom Gugliotta retires: The all-time SLN bag thief…the modern era Chandler Parsons…would put Chase Daniel to shame. Another guy who had some early success with the Suns teams, but by the end become one of the worst players in the league – or an elite tank commander, depending on how you look at. Googs averaged a cool 10 points on 42.7% shooting on 2 turnovers a game at PF and landed me Iso Joe in the process. Guess it wasn’t all bad.
2005 170 Hawks SF Larry Johnson retires: LJ made a few All Star Games and was part of a few frisky Nets teams in the Prad era, but his volume was very high considering his efficiency, and the defense was never much to write home about. His stats also fluctuated pretty wildly year-to-year, so always a bit of a dice roll what you were gonna get with him (no UNLV pun intended).
Until next offseason…we’re waiting for you Dikembe (but not YOU yet TB, I know you have another season left in you).